Monday, December 18, 2006

Things men should not say during childbirth!!

-- Gosh, you're lucky. I sure wish men could experience the miracle of childbirth.
-- Do you think the baby will come before Monday Night Football starts?
-- I hope your ready. The Glamour Shot photographer will be here in fifteen minutes.
-- If you think this hurts, I should tell you about the time I twisted my ankle playing basketball.
-- That was the kids on the phone. Did you have anything planned for dinner?
-- When you lay on your back, you look like a python that swallowed a wild boar.
-- You don't need an epidural. Just relax and enjoy the moment.
-- This whole experience kind of reminds me of an episode from I Love Lucy.
-- Oops! Which cord was I supposed to cut?
-- Stop your swearing and just breathe.
-- Remember what we learned in Lamaze class! HEE HEE HOO HOO. You're not using the right words.
-- Your stomach still looks like there's another one in there.

5 comments:

Regina said...

Here's one Derek actually said when I told him to talk to me during the contractions: "So, what do you think about the whole Iraq thing?" I gave him the dirtiest look I could muster, good for him I was working too hard to talk!

Autumn said...

That should totally be on the list. That is hilarious!!

Laura said...

I can't remember anything Michael ever said during labor. I do remember him counting to ten when I was pushing, but that's about it! That is a really funny list. Regina, I can see Derek actually saying that :)!

Anonymous said...

You are too funny!

Hope you guys have a Merry Christmas!

Michelle said...

Okay Autumn I hope this makes you feel better after the burn you gave me in front of everyone...here I am writing on your blog from the East coast, you should feel special, since I hardly get on blogs at home anymore, usually just once a week maybe. I am going to try to get better on checking up on everyone, miss you all!